I fell asleep at my desk.
Not for long. Just a few seconds.
It was that wasteland time between 1 and 2pm, after a big lunch, after the caffeine had worn off.
My eyelids started to flutter, and then close, and then…maybe a minute had passed. I just drifted off, into one of those lazy flights of escape.
Sounds like a guy who needs a nap, right? Well, there’s a problem with that.
I gave up naps for Lent.
It’s been hard! No naps, except on Sundays. On Sundays I get to sleep my guts out. (Not till after church).
The rest of the week, I’m challenged to stay awake during the day.
I’ve always grabbed little naps here or there. 20 minutes before a meeting, 30 minutes before dinner, that kind of thing.
But lately, it seemed like my naps were getting longer. I was using them as an escape from the busy real world. Instead of giving me energy, they seemed to be sapping it.
I decided that maybe I could give that time to God, instead.
Remember Jesus, in the Garden?
40 Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Couldn’t you men keep watch with me for one hour?” he asked Peter. 41 “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” –Matthew 26:40-41
I want to stand watch with Jesus. I want my spirit to be willing.
But, alas, my flesh has proven to be weak on a couple occasions this Lent. Sitting in my living room, I’ve found the need to close my eyes, just for a couple minutes. And here, at my desk, the day’s work just seems too much to handle.
I take my eye off the prize, and then Zzzzzzzzzz.
As vigilant as you and I long to be, we may be destined to fall asleep on the job, to lose our focus, to give into our weaknesses. It’s bound to happen every once in a while.
But if Lent accomplishes anything, it reminds us that being a living sacrifice for God does not mean achieving perfection.
It means being willing to take up the cross, even if we’ll fall.
It means following faithfully the path of Christ, even if we’ll stray.
It means living with our eyes wide open…
Well, at least most of the time.
Have a great week,