The Bachelor

jesusrose

I was thinking about Jesus.

We describe him in a million ways: Savior, Lord, Prince Of Peace, etc.

But here’s one word we never mention: Bachelor.

Jesus was a single guy. Unattached. No ringy on the fingy.

Dan Brown-type speculation aside, as far as we know, Jesus was an unfettered fella.

My question is: Why? Why not find someone, settle down, and get married? He was here, in part, to have a human experience, so why not experience marriage?

Hmm. Maybe he never found the right person. When you’re, you know, divine, it could be hard finding someone compatible.

Or maybe he wasn’t much of a looker. Paintings of Jesus make him look like Brad Pitt, but in 2002 Popular Mechanics commissioned some forensic artists to create their best guest representation of what Jesus would have looked like.

Here’s what they came up with:

popular-mechanicsI’m not much of a judge—but would Angelina Jolie marry that guy? I have no idea.

I’d say the most likely reason Jesus never got married was because he was already married…to his job.

The Bible actually has a few places that seem to insinuate this. As if Jesus was the groom, and the Church was the bride.

I don’t know about that, but I can tell that Jesus lived and breathed the Kingdom of God. He had a message to share, and took every opportunity to share it. His devotion to the Good News was so complete that he was willing to die a bachelor for it.

There’s a TV show called “The Bachelor”. Have you watched it? I’ll be honest and share that I haven’t. I really don’t like “reality” shows in general. But enough people think this show is so great that it’s in its seventeenth season. (M*A*S*H, by comparison, had eleven seasons)

The premise, as I understand it, is pretty simple. An eligible bachelor gets to date a bunch of women, and sort his way down to “the one” — the winner, whom, the bachelor would supposedly marry. (But never does, apparently!)

Each week, the Bachelor gives roses to all the women who are still in the running, and the rest go home.

Jesus would have made a terrible contestant on The Bachelor.

Who would he not love? Who would he exclude and send home with a broken heart?

How could he choose to love one over another?

With this Bachelor…

Everybody gets a rose.

Have a great week,

Mitch

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