It happened, late one afternoon when David rose from his couch and was walking about on the roof of the king’s house, that he saw from the roof a woman bathing; the woman was very beautiful. 

2 Samuel 11:2

This is a tale of one guy, and two relationships:

Remember David and Jonathan? In 1 Samuel these guys become the closest of friends. Chapter 18 even tells us that “Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself.” It’s a profound story of friendship and honor.

Remember David and Bathsheba? A very different story. David simply saw a woman, thought she was hot, and with no other considerations claimed her for himself. He treated her as a commodity. There was no love, and no honor.

How could the same guy treat two people so very differently?

(Truth is, we tend to do the same thing.)

I’d like for you to meet a guy named Martin Buber. He was born in 1878 and lived in Austria. He was a philosopher who identified two different kinds of relationships.

First, there is the “I-it” relationship. Like the story of Bathsheba, this is when one person treats another person as an object.

Who have you treated like an “it” this week? The guy bagging your groceries, or in the car in front of you? How about the Republican/Democrat who spouts nonsense on social media. Or the attractive person jogging past your house. Anytime you dehumanize, objectify, or dismiss someone, even subconsciously, you’re treating them like an “it”.

The second type is the “I-Thou” relationship. Like the deep friendship between David and Jonathan, this is when one person honors the worth, even the divine spark of the Creator, in another.

Who have you treated like a “Thou” this week? The friend you truly listened to as they shared about their health scare? The child you took a moment to play with? The Republican/Democrat that you disagreed with, but refused to demonize?

How many “I-it” interactions did you have today, and how many “I-Thou” interactions? I have a lot more “its” than I would like to admit. It takes effort to honor every person I interact with.

If you put a rubber band around your wrist and snapped it every time you went into “I-it” mode with someone, would you be sore by the end of the day? Maybe, over time, you’d start to realize that every interaction is an opportunity, even a privilege, even with people you don’t particularly like or vehemently disagree with.

Think of this as faith-in-training, or love-in-action, and watch yourself getting stronger as you go. When you try not to “it” all over somebody, you are acknowledging them, and God, and even yourself.

Maybe you’ll honor somebody surprising today, and be astounded when they

“Thou” you right back.

Have a great week,

Mitch